WTF Did I Just Watch??? (Part 1)
Documentaries that reflect our society and our times (late stage capitalism), and sometimes our own desire to feel better about ourselves, some schadenfreude.
I’m human, sometimes when I watch documentaries, especially those of “contemporary” situations, I often feel self-righteous - this could NEVER happen to me! I would NEVER treat other people like this! I would NEVER fitting in above all other things including people I love and my own health! I would NEVER fall for this marketing, this gaslighting, this obvious magical thinking!
But in the end, I’m not sure that’s true. What is true is that whatever schadenfreude I may feel when watching these, mostly I feel anger, sadness, resolve, frustration, and desire for equity and justice, and a recognition that in additional to personal free will and agency, there is a huge systemic reasons these things thrive and continue to happen.
But these documentaries have a lot in common, despite the range of topics. They reflect a deep desire to fit in, usually with a societal norm that is impossible for all except the uber rich and white, and/or the dominant culture of the individual and global societies we live in. They reflect the lengths someone will go to fit in, to feel love and connection, and what someone will overlook and who cast aside for that feeling of connection, including their own self-respect and protection. They reflect a willingness by corporations and their leaders to do whatever it takes to sell their “product” - whether its clothes, an album, a lifestyle, a feeling of well being and connection - no matter who it hurts, because profits are all that matter. They reflect a clear reliance on our short term memory, because these stories are universal and evergreen and keep on happening. They reflect a society, government (in the US and globally) and laws that are not at all equipped to regulate and stop these behaviors.
Desire to Fit In: Or Actually, THRIVING ON EXCLUSION
Documentary: Brandy Melville and the Cult of Fashion (Max): Especially for those of you with teens/tweens who want to shop here or already do, worth a watch for the impact on their store on not only body image, definitions of beauty, and who gets hired for front the of the house or behind the scenes (spoiler alert - based on body type and/or race) and also for the continued reality of how our shopping habits and consumer habits impact the greater global climate and pollution and populations across the world forced to produce the fashion and then get rid of it when we are tired of it.
Documentary Series: Victoria’s Secret Angels and Demons (Hulu): This is about the company and its creation of a brand that continues to impact how people define desirable and beautiful, how this continues to be marketed to younger and younger age tweens. Throw in a real history of Antisemitism in this country and the world and how it impacted the leader of the company and how he made decisions that reflected the exact society that discriminated against him and his family, sexual harassment and abuse in the workplace, and yet another example of Jeffrey Epstein being supported, enabled, and allowed to run amok, it’s just galling and very sad.
Documentary: White Hot: The Rise & Fall of Abercrombie & Fitch (Netflix): Fast fashion, global waste and exploitation of workers, and yes for the consumers of this brand, marketing to a certain standard of desirability (spoiler alert: for women - too thin, for men - only certain type of bodies and build, and for consumers and staff, welcome only to certain types of people, communities and bodies)
Desire for Connection and Love: Or Actually, CULTS
Most of these are about cults, but honestly so are the ones above. However worth considering how most cults, across cultures and generations rely on taking money from their people, demanding full obedience from its people, especially the women, and usually fall into brainwashing and physical and sexual abuse.
Documentary Series: Dancing with the Devil - The 7M TikTok Cult (Netflix): This is current times, and totally weird and ongoing. Made with the support of families still trying to get their family back, and the dance-fluencers are still going strong on the TikTok.
Documentary Series: The Program - Cons, Cults and Kidnapping (Netflix): This was so sad, parents falling for marketing of “fixing” their kids, and the lasting impacts of it. And the connections of staff and approach, between these programs and Synanon (see below). And like so many cults - questionable tactics, physical and sexual abuse in the form of discipline, and convincing “clients” in this case parents to persuade other “clients” to be come customers by sending their kids to these programs. And a recognition that maybe kids need mental health support, and access to health care, and that a definition of a “well behaved” child is designed by certain people to create and punish others and support a growing prison state, whether “by the state/government” or more like these programs.
Documentary Series: The Synanon Fix - Did the Cure Become a Cult? (Max): I watched this after the Program because I had not heard of Synanon before and it’s quite interesting to learn about the desire to eradicate drug and alcohol addiction often devolves into programs like this very quickly, into loss of control, agency, and cutting off your loved ones outside this program, and throwing all your finances into it. And as usual, never questioning why people feel the need to turn to these substances and forget life and their struggles in the first place.
Documentary Series: Seduced - Inside the NXIVM Cult (Starz): Specifically about NXIVM cult from the perspective of actress Catherine Oxenberg’s journey trying to get her daughter India Oxenbuerg out of it. It is useful to watch this as a companion piece to The Vow (See below).
Documentary Series: The Vow (Max): Also about NXIVM, and 2 seasons now including the court case, and made by folks who were originally in the cult, hence all the many hours of original internal footage. This documentary also shares the reality, both for cults, but also for broader society, what huge role enablers and groomers play, and how often they are the same demographic being abused by the cult. In NXIVM case, the leader having a group of women leaders bring people into, push the physical and sexual abuse (including branding), and demand “collateral”, personal information hat could be used to blackmail in the future. Many of the folks found guilty are being released from prison right now, while others are still in court and or serving time.
Documentary Series: Ashley Madison - Sex, Lies & Scandal (Netflix): All I can say is that there were about 17 million members of this website which was marketed so that people could cheat on their partners when it was hacked almost 10 years and their names were leaked to the public and their families. Today there are over 30 million members! There was some real nuanced storytelling in this though about folks who have truly open relationships, and a discussion of what monogamy is and should be, and the difference for men and women in this for society, and the extreme level of shaming once the names were leaked, and the hypocrisy of some members who talked a game of faithfulness in their public lives, but were on the site. And the site continues on!
